Incredibly Loud, Customized Honda Civic Impresses Literally Everyone
A student recently seen and heard whipping around WCC’s main campus in a distractingly loud Honda Civic has drawn the respect and admiration he so seemingly craves from literally every student, faculty and staff member on campus.
Chad Thompson, the owner of the puke-green Civic which he customized in his friend Greg’s driveway while watching a YouTube tutorial, could be heard from all corners of campus as he desperately attempted to be noticed by his peers in his fuel-efficient, entry-level vehicle. The time and effort spent customizing the Civic was not in vein, however, as many students voiced their admiration and envy in response to seeing Thompson drive by.
“I mean, you look at that guy and you just know that he’s really got it all figured out,” said Jennifer Garcia, a Nursing major who also works two part-time jobs to support her sick father. “Now I deeply regret wasting all of my money on useless crap like textbooks and food.”
Along with this kind of much deserved adulation, students who are attracted to men have also expressed their desire get to know Thompson on a more personal level.
“There’s something about him that just tells me that he would be the kind of caring and considerate partner I’m looking for,” said Christina Herrera, a Communications major. “I mean, there’s nothing at all about him that indicates that he would be an insecure, abusive, sociopathic tool.”
One of the vehicle’s main identifying features is a large spoiler attached to the rear, which presumably helps with its aerodynamics as Thompson arrives for his afternoon remedial English course. Thompson’s professors are all in unanimous agreement that he is among their favorite students.
“Chad Thompson always shows up on time, participates in class, and never smells like weed,” said all of Thompson’s professors in a joint-statement to the Viking News. “We are all quite certain that he will go very far in his desire to pursue a degree in Sports Management.”
Thompson could not be reached for comment, however, as he was reportedly too busy filming reactions to Logan Paul videos for his growing YouTube channel, “CTeezy420.” When he is not driving around campus, Thompson can be spotted showing off his tattoo drawn by his friend who is reportedly a “real artist, man,” and selling drugs to high school students.