Dean Tweedy and Dr. Morest Air Hockey Battle to Finally Determine Who Is Dr. Miles’ Favorite

Dean Tweedy and Dr. Morest duke it out on the air hockey field.
(Photo: Jules Viridian)

It was a clash of the cabinet on Friday, Jan. 19th, and scores were sought out to be settled. Sara Tweedy, Vice President and Dean of Student Access, Involvement and Success, against Dr. Vanessa Morest, Provost and Vice President of Academic Affairs. The heated battle of Air Hockey was sparked to finally settle who is Dr. Miles’ favorite.

Everyone was at the edge of their seats in the colosseum with the game waging every forward. The score was 6-6, both the Dean and Vice President looked exhausted but ever steady.

In a miscalculated hit by Morest, Tweedy maneuvered the puk through the hole, and the crowd went wild. Tweedy won the match

The “Beef,” as Tweedy called it, officially started with the Winter Commencement seating fiasco, where Dr. Morest was seated next to Dr. Miles, and Dean Tweedy was seated next to the Curriculum Chairs.

“I just thought it would be fun,” said Dr. Morest. “But Sara is very competitive and it turned into this whole thing.”

According to an anonymous source, Tweedy was seen at local arcades prior to the air hockey match, practicing with her trainer, a 13-year-old boy named Franklin Adams.

What started out as a harmless match between friends, escalated quickly when Tweedy came into the Student Events Room, flanked by cheering members of the SGA.

“It was really intense,” said Dave Smith, a WCC student drawn to the event by the crowd and pyrotechnics. “I thought it was a boxing match or something.”

The air hockey battle attracted quite a crowd In fact, half a dozen students showed up, which is the usual turnout for WEB events that don’t have free food.

“This is so dope,” said Jenna Terance, a WCC student who saw the event from outside the windows of the Student Center event room and came in to see what was going on. “This is my first semester at WCC and I thought community college was going to be boring but this was crazy.”

Johnny Rocker, another student who witnessed the intense matchup was also thoroughly impressed by the energy displayed on the air hockey field.

“Man, I hope that I can get an arch rival or something someday,” said Rocker. “Someone to pick fights with for no reason other than to have bragging right in the end. That’s the real American dream right there.”

When reached for a statement about her opinion on the match between Tweedy and Dr. Morest, President Miles just smiled and shook her head.

“Those ladies should know better. Everyone knows that Chester is my favorite,” Admitted President Miles.

We attempted to get a statement from the beloved viking mascot, but Chester took a vow of silence. The reason for the silence is unknown to us at this time, but it is assumed to be a pretty big deal since Chester hasn’t said a word in public since his arrival.

“I bet it was over a girl. I feel you Chester, I feel you,” said Smith.

No pucks were harmed in the event.

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