Elevator in AAB Out of Order for the Umpteenth Time

The elevator in the Academic Arts Building (AAB) continues to be a thorn in the eye of the student population as it is constantly out of order. While nobody seems to know why exactly the elevator keeps shutting down, students and professors may have the answer.

“I always hear noises whenever I’m walking past the elevator to take the stairs because it’s out of order,” said WCC student and art major Sarah Jordan. “I think it is being haunted by all the students who dropped out of my class in November.”

According to Jordan, her Graphic Design class started out with 30 students and is now down to six who attend regularly.

Considering that the dropout rate at WCC is over 84 percent, it would surely explain why the elevator never works with so many students who have time on their hands to haunt it.

“I don’t believe in ghost stories, but students haunting the elevator is the only explanation for the shrinking class sizes,” said Harold Fox, an adjunct biology professor who teaches on the fourth floor of the AAB. “You know, I started thinking it was my way of teaching but now that I am really thinking about this it must be due to supernatural causes that nobody’s coming anymore.”

The 16 percent who are still going to class are not happy with the constant hassle of climbing several flights of stairs to get to their classes.

“I am always 20 minutes late to class because I keep waiting for the elevator but it never comes because it’s out of order,” said Jay Pork, a WCC student who has no idea what he declared as his major four years ago. “But if it’s really haunted then chances are that the stairs are haunted, too. What if it’s not safe to go to class anymore?”

Investigations are ongoing but so far, WCC Administration can neither confirm nor deny that the reason for the constantly broken elevator might be a case of haunting.

“The elevator is being fixed,” said Patrick Hennessey, Director of College-Community Relations when asked why the elevator is often out of order.

Overall the consensus seems to be that the elevator may be haunted, but some have stopped questioning why the elevator is out of use.

“I don’t really see why we even need an elevator at this point in the semester,” said a WCC student who preferred to remain anonymous. “It’s not like anyone’s actually going to class anymore anyway.”

According to WCC student Janice Harvey, haunted or not, the elevator should be fixed immediately.

“I don’t care if they have to hire the Ghostbusters to get this done, but I’m not walking up the stairs anymore,” said Harvey. “I should get phys ed credits for taking the stairs to class twice a week.”

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